


Medusa

by public_enemy_sixx



Category: Mötley Crüe, The Dirt (2019), The Dirt: Confessions of the World's Most Notorious Rock Band Book - Mötley Crüe & Neil Strauss
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst with a Happy Ending, Greek Mythology AU, M/M, Mention of Past Abuse, Pre-Band, Soulmates, Tommy is a sweet bean, mention of rape, set in 1981
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-08
Updated: 2019-12-08
Packaged: 2021-02-25 22:35:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,977
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21723088
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/public_enemy_sixx/pseuds/public_enemy_sixx
Summary: It's 1981, Tommy and Nikki have been friends for a few months, but Tommy has never seen Nikki's eyes.There's a secret behind.(Greek mythology!AU, sorta)
Relationships: Tommy Lee/Nikki Sixx
Comments: 6
Kudos: 29





	Medusa

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone!  
> So this here is a little fic I wrote few months ago. There are no actual warnings to be honest (only a mention of rape in the contest of a Greek myth).  
> Despite the tags, it's not as angst as Permission.
> 
> I hope you enjoy it!
> 
> (Non beta read)

The first time Tommy had met Nikki they were in a bar, and the drummer hadn’t seen his eyes. It was a boiling Saturday in Los Angeles and, despite the temperatures, Sixx was in full glam mode, dressed in black leather, with jet-black hair, black everything. Tommy looked kinda stupid in his high-waisted tight denim and yellow shirt. Figuring something out about Sixx had been nearly impossible since that dark and thick fringe made it impossible to see Nikki’s eyes. Like a curtain on the stage of an unknown theatre, like a cloud hiding a mysterious moon that could move seas.

Even when they started hanging out regularly, Nikki never took hair away from his face. It seemed like he wanted to avoid eye contact, so Tommy thought he had some strange issues. Though, after a few months of friendship, Lee still hadn’t seen the older’s eyes.

*****

"Your parents are amazing." Nikki commented once they were outside Tommy's house. The bassist had been welcomed like a son, he almost felt home for the first time in so long.

"Well… they are, yeah. Don't you ever miss yours?" Lee asked, offering a cigarette to his friend, who accepted gladly. They were walking towards the Rainbow, as the night was falling on the city.

The bassist frowned, his voice dropping all of a sudden. "I hope they'll rot in hell." He commented and finally lit that cigarette, indulging in a long drag that seemed to calm his nerves a little.

Tommy changed the subject to avoid making him angry.

*****

“What color are your eyes?” Tommy asked once, before sipping loudly his chocolate milkshake.

It was one of the many dog days on the Sunset, and the two friends were sitting at a cheap café where Athena's boyfriend worked. Athena was Tommy’s sister and he was very protective over her since they had always shared everything. Lee had asked Nikki to hang out together while he checked on that guy, and they took the chance to buy a drink. Finding relief to the heat seemed to have become Los Angeles’ priority, and staying with Nikki had become Tommy’s priority.

Hearing that question, Nikki turned to Tommy and flashed a grin that looked almost bittersweet.

“Green.” He so said, before finishing his iced coffee and looking away, without letting Tommy watch through his sunglasses. Who the fuck wore sunglasses inside a bar?

The drummer sighed and let the topic off, settling down for that small answer. 

Their day went for the best until Tommy had to go home.

*****

The first time Tommy had seen Nikki with the fringe away from his forehead, the bassist was rocking a ponytail. 

Pretty weird for him, to be honest. His hair looking still wet and dark with sand in between the messy locks. 

It was more or less 6 pm, the drummer remembered it because there was a beautiful sunset and the two of them were on the beach, in a desert place in Santa Monica. The sun was slowly drowning in the sea, painting it orange and yellow and light shone bright, yet delicate, invading the air and filling everything with sudden peace.

Nikki was looking at the sea, sitting on the wet sand, diving into so many thoughts. 

“Sixx,” the taller called him, appearing suddenly by his side. The bassist winced in surprise and immediately looked away, avoiding any eye contact. Tommy was starting to think all of that was some kind of joke. “don’t worry, just wanted to know if you wanna go home now.”

The bassist let his hair down again, his fringe covering his forehead and eyes. “Get you in ten, if you wanna go.”

To be honest, Tommy didn’t want to go away, and so stood at Nikki’s side and spent minutes and minutes fantasizing about those oh so secret eyes, wondering how the sunset light would change that mysterious shade of green. 

They then walked towards Tommy’s van and spent the trip in silence, listening to Cheap Tricks on the radio.

  
*****

Tommy had recently gone living on his own, finally away from his family. It hadn't been hard, besides money, and anyway he loved the idea of being independent. He had already invited Nikki multiple times and they wanted to use the place to rehearse, even though they were only two instruments. They just had to settle down, they were going to find a singer and a guitarist very soon. They liked playing together anyway, because they had a very pleasant chemistry.

“Can I use your shower?” Was the first question that Nikki Sixx asked a Tommy that had just got out of bed. The bassist was standing at the front door, hands in his pockets and sunglasses on, of course. He was also visibly sweating, it was way too hot outside. 

“It's 7 in the morning and you came here to ask me if you can take a shower?” Lee whined, scratching his eyes and yawning. He needed a coffee, right in that moment. 

“It's 2 pm.” The older pointed out. “And yes, I totally did.” Tommy was doubtful but decided not to ask any question: he didn't want to know why Nikki needed to use his shower at 7 am, or 2 pm, or any time in the day. He probably got kicked out of his apartment, _again._

“Yeah, come in.” He then said, sighing and letting the bassist in. “Be home.” he added, knowing there was no need to tell Nikki where the bathroom was. He had been in that house almost every day.

“Of course, thank you T-bone.” 

They didn't talk too much: Tommy gave the bassist a clean towel and told him not to mess up things in there. Nikki laughed, more like a small giggle, and soon he disappeared in the bathroom. As Tommy heard the water running, he decided to finally put some clothes on: a simple t-shirt and grey sweatpants for comfort. He waited for Nikki to come out, sitting on the sofa that in many nights had hosted Sixx, and listening to some music with a cold coffee in hand.

Each time he thought about Nikki, the whole eyes thing would come to his mind. Nine months of friendship, and he had never seen those eyes. Often he wondered the reasons behind that unusual, weird choice. Lee knew that Nikki was pretty introverted and the only way to get to know him very well was music, which bounded them like brothers. Another way to know a person is through their eyes because eyes are the window to the soul, but maybe Nikki didn't want anyone to see his soul. 

Tommy had realized his feelings for Nikki, recently. Feelings that were well above friendship and, even if he refused to name them or to talk about it with anyone, he knew that he couldn't ignore them forever.

Maybe that was the reason why he felt the desire, the _need_ to look into those eyes and see if there was the same spark, the same warmth that Tommy felt every second they spent together.

But at that point, he wasn't even sure Nikki could feel anything at all.

And anyway, Tommy had thought to be straight for his whole life and now, Nikki happened? Shit was weird as hell. And also painful, because he was pretty sure Sixx, despite being pretty open-minded, would've never accepted him as gay, bisexual or whatever the hell he was.

The sound of the bathroom door being opened -that thing was creaky as fuck-, distracted Tommy from all those thoughts. He looked at Nikki with the corner of his eye, trying not to be too damn obvious, to notice his damp hair and his face, finally free and visible. He turned around suddenly, staring at the bassist, who looked into Tommy's dark irises. None could manage to look away.  
  


“It's a nice green.” Tommy simply said, staring right at him and standing up. He slowly walked towards the older, to enjoy each emerald shades that adorned those beautiful eyes. And everything was almost unreal, dream-like, Tommy was afraid he'd never have a second chance.

Nikki remained silent, doubtful, playing with his own hands. “Thanks. Never heard that compliment.” He said, looking kinda sick.

“Dude, you look pale. Are you okay?” The drummer asked, frowning at Nikki's reaction. He made him sit on the sofa and gave him clean clothes -a T.rex shirt and sweatpants-, waiting for him to get dressed. 

“You need some water?” he asked, as he looked at Nikki's moves: kinda graceful and totally different from the ones he had on stage. He was shaking lightly and Tommy wished he could hug him; but he knew Nikki was very reticent about physical contact.

“Would be great, thanks.” the older said as he sat down on the sofa again, and Tommy soon handed him a glass of fresh water, with some sugar. Nikki drank it in a few seconds while the drummer sad with him. “Have you ever heard the story of Medusa?” the black haired guy asked, all of a sudden.

That was so out of context that Tommy didn't even know what to answer: he frowned, not understanding how it could be related to their topic. “In school, I guess? Don't remember much.”

Nikki sighed lightly, crossed his legs and lit up a cigarette, immediately taking a drag from it. “Alright, lemme tell you a story. Medusa was a gorgon, the only human of three sisters which represented moral, sexual and intellectual perversion. She was a beautiful woman, graceful enough that every living creature would look at her.”

Tommy raised his hand like a schoolkid: “Okay, but wasn't she the girl with snake hair and stuff?” he remembered some things about Greek culture. They didn't study much of it in school, but he had always found it incredibly interesting.

“Yes, lemme get to it. One day Poseidon, king of the Seas, fell in love with her and wanted to lie with her.” Nikki kept on talking, his voice was quiet, almost like he was hurt from that same story. Like he had lived it on his skin, somehow, like it was part of him. “But she didn't, so he forced her. He raped her and she tried to hide her face behind Athena’s statue. The Goddess punished Medusa for her vanity, turning her into a monster.”

“Wait, how is Medusa considered vain? She was assaulted!” Tommy exclaimed, at that point, he was really invested in the story. And suddenly the ancient mythology felt so real, so everyday-like, and T-bone thought about all the girls that went through the same path in different ways.

Nikki shrugged, suddenly getting up: “I don't know Tommy, I'm not Athena. I can't believe your Greek ass didn't know this story.”

“Anyway, why are you telling me this?” Tommy asked, making himself more comfortable on the sofa and following Nikki with his gaze. It was weird to finally look into his eyes, and see the light in them. The rage, the desire to wreck everything, the need for freedom. To be honest, Nikki wasn't so different from what Tommy had imagined to that point.

“When I was very little, Nona told me this story and warned me about a thing: once I'd become an adult, I'd be able to turn people into stone without my control, like Medusa.” Sixx sat down on the table, looking right in front of him, where Tommy was, burning him with his gaze. Unintentionally, because Nikki wasn't very used to glance at people while they could see his eyes, so he just looked rather creepy. “Because of my past, you know? I told you my childhood was kinda fucked up.” 

“And that's why you never let your eyes be seen by anyone, right? But it shit didn't work on me.” the taller stated, fidgeting his legs as usual. Nikki had grown used to it, so he wasn't even bothered anymore.

“Nona told me another thing. Do you believe in soulmates, Tommy?”

T-bone's eyes widened in surprise at the question: “Soulmates…? Never really thought about it.”

“Well, she told me the only person who could resist to this would be my soulmate,” he concluded, taking another drag from the cigarette and blowing it in the heated air. Tommy was speechless, which was unusual for him. His mind was a mess, trying to connect all the dots and form a coherent thought, a decent answer to that.

“You gotta be kidding man…” he whispered. Not decent, but still an answer. The drummer laid down on the couch like he needed some more moments to realize. And Nikki, slightly worried about him, sat down next to his friend again and took his wrist to feel the pulse of his quickened heartbeat.

“I'm not, I'm shocked just as you. I don't think I'm gay or anything, soulmates ain't a thing you decide.” he sighed as he let the other's arm and put the cigarette off in the nearest ashtray.

Tommy finally looked at him with a little smile. He always had that innocent, joyful sparkle in his eyes. He was the total opposite of Nikki, but none of them was bothered by that. “Hey it's alright, I wouldn't mind it anyway. As you said, a soulmate isn't someone you can choose;" he paused for a few seconds, looking at his friend with the corner of his eyes, "and I gotta say I'm okay with you being mine.”

“Are you saying it doesn't weird you out?” Sixx was finally smiling, too. He almost never smiled, and Tommy felt a pleasurable stabbing sensation in his heart every time he witnessed those lips curving in a shy, cute manner.

“Listen, I might be slightly gay for you and anyway, after hearing this story, nothing can weird me out.”

“Stupid.” the older chuckled, before realizing what Tommy had really said: “Wait, are you gay?”

“No? I don't think so…” the drummer mumbled, unsure about the best words to use. But maybe at that point, spilling the entire truth would've been better than keeping motherfuckin’ secrets. Secrets ruin friendships, and Tommy wasn't intentioned to lose Nikki. “I mean, I realized I have some feelings for you, don't wanna name them yet, but if we're soulmates it means something, right?” he so dared to say, and Nikki's reaction came quite unexpectedly. Tommy was expecting a ‘fuck you' or something, but instead, his lips found Nikki's in a kiss. A delicate and maybe awkward kiss, because none of them seemed to have the guts to deepen it. 

“I- uh…” Nikki fumbled, but the look Tommy gave him was so full of feelings that the bassist kissed him again, almost like he was possessed.

And this time everything felt natural, which meant fast and violent and full of unnamed feelings. Nikki bit the other's lip, making him gasp visibly at the sensation. The vibrant green of Nikki's irises seemed to shine with a new feeling, which Tommy couldn't really tell.

“Do you think things are going to work?” the bassist asked in a hushed voice, his forehead pressed against Tommy’s.

“Which things?”

“Us,” Nikki cooed, turning his head away from Tommy. His rosy cheeks showed new shades of his heart and Tommy was so glad and surprised. “are we going to make it?” he asked, his voice was full of worry, of that kind of pain only lonely people endure.

He had never thought he was destined to have a soulmate. _That only happens in fairy tales,_ he would tell himself, and then proceeded with falling in love with people only to hurt them in the end. Because none of them were his true soulmates. His fate was to be alone, he had hurt too many people to trust himself anymore.

The taller then smiled softly, cupping Nikki’s face and smiling at him, before kissing his cheek. “Always, no matter what.”

“What a romantic motherfucker. I'm gonna get diabetes.” the bassist playfully complained, his smile would reveal all of his feelings. He really couldn't believe Tommy was alive and well, that nothing had happened when their eyes met, when their lips touched. That there were no tears nor desperate situations. 

"At least you know what you're signing for." Lee clicked his tongue. They fell silent, then, Tommy looking at Nikki and Nikki looking at the old and ruined, but oh so familiar, sofa. The atmosphere was quiet. There was some uncertainty, still, in fear's fault. 

A gay relationship, in the 80s, between two guys trying to become famous. That could've blown everything up, destroy their life-long dream. Was it worth the risk? 

Nikki sighed. "Do you think we should make it public?"

Tommy frowned, his eyes veiled with the same preoccupation that darkened Nikki's: "I don't know, that might be a bad idea. But what do _you_ think?"

"This is gonna be our secret, at least for now." Nikki agreed, his hand found Tommy's. Their fingers intertwined shyly, and Lee strengthened the hold.

"By the way, you can sleep here if you wanna. Since you got kicked out." He said after a few moments of silence, and Nikki clicked his tongue at him:

"How do you know it?"

"Because you woke up earlier than 6pm, which, for the record, you never do."

Nikki laughed: "Alright, alright, I have my stuff in the car."

"Fine, go and take it so we can find some place for your clothes." 

In the end, Nikki didn't sleep on the sofa anymore. The bed was pretty small for the two of them, but they could arrange it by sleeping on each other despite the extra hot temperatures. Nikki was feeling home like never before, and it was the most beautiful sensation. He would've phoned Nona, sooner or later, to tell her he had found his soulmate like she had said.

**Author's Note:**

> If you reached the end, thank you! I hope you liked this little piece, and leave comment/kudos if you did! Any criticism is always appreciated.


End file.
